Ah, Sweet Sweet Efficiency

In the spirit of the title of the post, I’ll keep this one short but sweet…

Guess what I got in the mail yesterday?

Go ahead…guess!

Got it in your head yet?

I got…you ready? I got brand new insurance cards paid for by the lovely Department of Education from which I resigned SIX MONTHS AGO! Evidently, I am still covered. Which, in my mind, means that the DOE is still paying for me to have coverage. Coverage that I haven’t used and wouldn’t use because a) I don’t work there anymore and b) I canceled six months ago by resigning.

Now some people have labeled me a “complainer.” And that is fine. You say complaining, I say “telling the truth about things that no one else (besides other teachers) wants to acknowledge and therefore you (non-teacher) find intimidating because (gasp) teachers are only supposed to smile and hand out stickers while playing their acoustic guitar.” (And I’d say all that in one big breath. So there.) We’ll just go with “complainer” for now since it’s shorter and easier to type. In the past, I have complained about not always having the stuff I needed to teach my friends. (Let’s see here, here, here and here. Maybe I am a complainer plain and simple…) Although in all honesty, we had a lot of stuff when compared to other schools. And if I’m really being honest, the stuff does not replace good teaching but it certainly helps. A lot. But that’s a blog post for another day.

Regardless, schools are certainly not places where money should be wasted. I think we can all agree on that. I’m pretty sure the money spent to insure my health could be better spent on ANYTHING besides a former employee who has no intention of using said coverage.

To a teacher, that type of waste is unfathomable. And as I type that, I’m thinking of one of my Super Colleagues in particular. You see, I worked with one Super Colleague who refused to waste ANYTHING. (The end result often meant that her closets and shelves made have organizational panic attacks, but whatever, girlfriend had EVERYTHING and was willing to share.) This is a woman who saved old tuna fish cans to use for erasers, always had a minimum of 3 dozen toilet paper tubes on hand, had a basket for “miscellaneous crafts” which contained assorted sequins, rosettes and cut out stars and, for some reason I can’t understand, continued to save miles of that velcro tape – you know, the kind that’s sticky on one side? Now that stuff can totally come in handy and is great to have, but my Super Colleague had miles of just one side….the rough side…and she insisted on saving it because someday, SOMEDAY, she might happen upon the other side and God forbid she had recklessly thrown out these miles in a feng shui fit of insanity. I mean, talk about knowing how to save a dollar!! While I hadn’t yet achieved the hoarding capabilities of my Super Colleague, I definitely packed away old crayons, scraps of paper and cardboard and a hodge podge of markers every year with the rationale, “I might need it someday and then I won’t have to go to the store.” (Of course, MY hoarded spoils were kept in color coded labeled tubs, but hey, that’s just me…)

So please, DOE, PLEASE! Cancel my health insurance!! There are teachers out there frantically saving egg cartons, muffin tins and old soup cans in an effort not to spend their entire pay checks on their classrooms….do it for them. Just do it for them.

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  • OH MY ! I know a lot of substitute teachers who would be so angry to know this! They have to pay for insurance from their tiny paychecks!

    December 10, 2009 at 3:49 pm
  • I expect that it's more a clerical error than a $$$$ error on their part. I bet if you used the card, you would find out sooner or later that they weren't going to pay and that either you would be stuck with the bill or have to use other insurance.

    December 10, 2009 at 3:49 pm
  • Earl and Vickie -I certainly hope you're right! I'm going to make some phone calls today to get to the bottom of this.

    December 10, 2009 at 3:50 pm
  • I would like to point out that the you can get all KINDS of stuff to stick to the rough side of velcro tape. I'm always left with extra bits of the fuzzy side, which is pretty much useless. 😛

    December 10, 2009 at 9:09 pm
  • Wow, I had no idea I used to work with you! You described my classroom (and sadly, my spare bedroom) perfectly!!!

    December 10, 2009 at 9:09 pm
  • This makes me think of today, when I waffled for 15 minutes about what to do with my less-than-an-ounce of color-mixed glitter. Should I keep it (in one of my many empty film canisters), mix it with another color-mixed glitter canister, or toss it?
    Yeah, I saved it. Glitter is expensive.

    Also, I just found your blog and I LOVE IT. I think most teachers would fall into the "complainer" category, although we're not always productive about it. Thanks for the laughs (you know, so I don't cry myself to sleep) 🙂

    December 11, 2009 at 12:32 pm
  • Your subs get INSURANCE?

    December 11, 2009 at 12:32 pm
  • If you don't want that insurance, may I have it?

    December 13, 2009 at 1:57 pm
  • Your blog is absolutely brilliant. I just found it today and have read only a handful of your posts, but I look forward to reading the rest!!

    December 13, 2009 at 1:57 pm
  • At retirement I had years and years and boxes and boxes (uniformly sized and labeled, of course) of stuff. A lot I gave away, some I trashed, and the rest I'm slowly taking to the curb. It's been four years and it's becoming a little less painful; but without them I'd be totally without my identity. Sometimes I go to the basement and just look through them and remember . . .

    December 15, 2009 at 1:07 pm

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