Sippin’ On Gin and Juice…

….or I guess Malibu and juice would be more accurate…well, if I’m really honest, probably just Malibu.

First of all, I AM OFFICALLY ON SUMMER VACATION!!!! And what am I doing first? Blogging. I’m not sure what that says about me. OK, well the first thing I did was make coffee, and then blog. But I am excited to be in control of my own time all day today…what will I do with all my time??? I mean, just the idea of being able to pee when I want to is exciting…how sad is that?

Yesterday wasn’t easy though. The kids were pumped, and I was ready to be done, but we had to endure another useless half day in which no learning took place at all. Add to that the lack of structure that permiates the school on the last day, combine that with some donut holes and you have a recipe for a super head ache. I was sad to see many of them go (actually teared up a bit), but there’s something about that last day and all the chaos surrounding putting one’s classroom to bed that makes it much easier to say goodbye (and don’t let the door hit you on the….).

I don’t expect many gifts. My students can’t afford them, but occassionally families get creative. Some of you may remember my heart warming tale of Christmas Joy in which I recieved an actual G-string from a student. (So serious…although, to be totally truthful, it was for me AND Mr. Mimi – or at least that’s what the kid told me.) I did get some very sweet cards this year, and a few overly shiny necklaces lovingly selected from the Dollar Store. All very thoughtful. And then…

I had a parent (who I really like) come up to me with a real winner.

Parent:”Here you go, girl. I know you can use this!!” (She hands me a brown paper bag) “Sorry I didn’t get a chance to wrap it.”

Me: “Don’t worry. You didn’t have to do this. Thank you so much for thinking of me.”

I take the bag and peek inside to find…

…a bottle of Malibu rum.

Yes, booze.

Now, I do happen to enjoy the fruity cocktail topped off with a bit of alcholic coconut-flavored love, but…we are in a school. And I work inside that school. I do NOT sit outside the school sipping on a little gin and juice. Or at least, I don’t yet.

I thank the parent (isn’t it the thought that counts?) and quickly fold over the top of the bag, trying desperately to hide the fact that now I am leading my class upstairs holding a bottle of booze.

Fast foward to last night. I am home from work (and offically on vacation!). Clearly, I’m slightly drunk. No, no, not off the Malibu. But I did go have one or two (or five) beers with the girls to celebrate the end of the year.

Mr. Mimi comes home and congratulates me on finishing the year in one piece. I tell him to reach into my bag to see the thoughtful gift that I had receieved. I am literally dying for him to see it…I mean, it’s just too good.

He pulls out the bottle of Malibu. ” Get out!!” he shouts, “A PARENT gave you this? Which one?”

As I begin to tell him the story, he holds up the bottle to the light (why do people do that?) and interrupts me saying,

“This bottle is open.”


“It’s open. Did you have any?”

“Uh, no.”

“So they gave you an open bottle of rum? And look, there’s some missing.”

He holds up the bottle again, and we notice that it isn’t full. Someone has defintely taken a sip or two (or five).


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